Saturday, January 4, 2020

2011

April 22, 2011

Candice Stewart MacDaniels: How is the newly expanded family doing? Saw Jason's new mower on your blog.

Adam and I are doing pretty good. We finally decided to take a break from trying after the 3rd miscarriage. Booked a cruise...kind of our very late honeymoon....then found out I was prego after all. Found a new nephrologist in Minden who is absolutely fabulous. Pretty new out of school and very thorough. He has taken me off of Imuran and increased prednisone for the 1st trimester...which will be over May 20 based on the U/S measurements. He also tested for coagulopathies and discovered I have a Protein S deficiency. So this time I am on a baby aspirin daily + Lovenox 40mg sq q12hrs. It looks like I am an abused wife with all the bruises on my tummy but maybe it will all work out. Right now we are just taking it day by day. Hope you and Lydia are doing great. I will keep you posted.

July 6, 2011:
From Candice Stewart MacDaniels: Guess I forgot to update you.  We had another miscarriage.  Waited to see the heartbeat at atleast 2 visits before telling the family, but when went back a week later, there was no heartbeat.  Had a D & C May 3rd.  I started a new job May 16th (actually had the interview the day after we found out about the m/c). It's a small hospital in Minden  where my new nephrologist also works.  Also, my new OBGYN is there as well.  I loved my other one but Dr. Alsaka (nephrologist) really wanted me to change to his colleague so it would be easy to work together on my case.  Every single person in the pharmacy department is absolutely amazing.  Great group to work with/for.  Anyway, per MD orders, I am unable to use hormonal bc due to the increased clotting risks and I am suppose to stay on Lovenox daily and increase to bid as as I get a positive test.  We're really doing okay about it and not going to actively try for a little while.  We do plan to visit Tennessee within a year's time and hopefully can meet up with you, Jason, and Lydia.
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2013

April 29, 2012
The results are back and it is not what we hoped to hear. Apparently, I have multiple issues that would cause me to continue to have pregnancy losses. It is very unlikely that I will biologically have a healthy child, and my doctor does not recommend me trying anymore. Of course I am saddened by this news, but after 4 years and 5 miscarriages, we now have an answer. I don't know when it will happen, but God has our baby coming towards us a little everyday. However, the end of September will be a sad time (would have been our baby girl's due date).

April 15, 2013

 #firstbump #bump
Candice Stewart MacDaniels We are so excited and very thankful for all the prayers from so many. We still get nervous at times, hard not to after so many losses. It is such a joy and relief to be able to feel zoe move throughout the day. I am bursting with happiness and loving my belly and every pregnancy symptom...both good and bad. 

 Image may contain: Candice Stewart MacDaniels, standing

June 11, 2013
I have an amnio scheduled for july 11 @ 15 weeks. Now I am freaking out. Wondering if I should just have MaterniT21 (tests for 13,18,21) and nuchal translucency first and if normal, just wait it out. Panicking about risk of mc after amnio. I have robertsonian 13,14. Any thoughts?
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 I wouldn't get 100% answers from maternit21 and nuchal but we won't terminate regardless so I dunno. It would be nice to know one way or the other. I will talk to my reg obgyn fri and call perinatologist as well. It is a tough decision.
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 Im 11 weeks now. I usually mc before 9 wks, except last time I got to 15w. We did nt last time and it was abnormal plus there was a hygroma and were told to expect to mc, which we did 2 weeks later.

 June 17, 2013
I have a nuchal translucency test scheduled for tomorrow. Last pregnancy, the NT scan showed a hygroma and non developing brain. We mcd before the amnio could be done. Getting a bit nervous.

 BT friend: "was that mc due to BT?"

 Candice: We didn't test to see if baby had ubt associated with my bt. FMS thought it was turners and also noted abnormal brain development but said he couldn't be sure. Since it was the first time I had made it past 9 weeks, we thought we were in the clear and had finally gotten our take home baby. It was devastating and I hate to admit it but I was relieved when baby's heart stopped a week later. Definitely the hardest mc. My theory is that taking progesterone prolonged an unhealthy pregnancy. This time I am not taking progesterone.

 June 23, 2013  I have a constant headache. Every day I go home and put a cold compress over eyes. Tylenol is not helping very much. When I walk very far at all, I hear my pulse in my head and it causes more pain. Any tips? Im going to try to get to the chiropractor tomorrow.

  Using a bit of caffeine when it gets bad and that helps. I am going through about a 20oz coke over 3 days. Dh keeps trying to get me to drink one cup of coffee a day, but I am really trying to avoid caffeine.

July 21, 2013
I have C. Diff. again.  This poor little baby is having to overcome a lot. Good news is that I have an ultrasound on Wednesday.
BT Friend:  What is Cdiff?

 Candice: Clostridium difficile. It is an opportunistic gastrointestinal bacteria that causes abdominal cramping, bloating, and diarrhea. I lost 10 pounds in 5 days when I was 10 weeks pregnant. Now I have it again. It has a habit of recurring in some individuals and I think being immunosuppressed after my kidney transplant and pregnant has made me a prime candidate for c.diff. It can also cause some nasty physical changes to your colon so hoping no permanent damage occurs.
It is the number one antibiotic associate infection, which is why taking probiotics is a good idea whenever you are on antibiotics. Florastor is a good one, though expensive

 It is the number one antibiotic associate infection, which is why taking probiotics is a good idea whenever you are on antibiotics. Florastor is a good one, though expensive
  • Some people have mild symptoms. This time, I have had more gas and cramping than diarrhea. But I definitely notice mucous in my bowl movements. It is really easy to test for, just turn in stool samples to lab and you will know that day. Antibiotics can cause those symptoms with or without c.diff and often times just discontinuing the drug that may have caused c.diff, is enough and your body can take care of it. Sometimes I just exaggerate my symptoms if they aren't taking me seriously. I am a pharmacist and know that a lot of symptoms are explained away and doctors don't want to test. Luckily, my new ob and my nephrologist will generally order whatever I request. I honestly didn't think it was c.diff the first time since I had been off antibiotics for a month, but the nurse practitioner decided to test. This time, I just called my nephrologist and requested a lab order be faxed to me and since I work in the hospital where the test was done, I knew the results within a couple hours and faxed them myself to the dr. It is pretty convenient. I always hate waiting and calling and waiting. Now I can just handle everything most of the time myself.
  • Candice Stewart MacDaniels Dr. is starting me back on vancomycin. I had 40 mls left on my scipt from previous since the order was for 10 to 14 days, and I only did 10. Do I compounded the solution last night and started myself on it. Nephrologist wanted to avoid flagyl due to interactions with my immumosuppresamts but after the first trimester I would be okay taking flagyl.

 July 24, 2013
17 week anatomy scan was perfect. And it is a GIRL! So so happy.

 No more testing for me as long as all keeps looking good. However, my OB has mentioned doing an amnio in late pregnancy to check baby's lung maturity because she is thinking of delivering me early as long as baby's lungs are ready. This has nothing to do with the BT but with my transplant and antiphospholipid syndrome.
 I will continue to be followed by FMS and my OB throughout the whole pregnancy and have another level II u/s scheduled in 5 weeks.

 July 25, 2013:  Names are hard

 I would love suggestions. For boys I like evan ethan mason logan garrett alex and max

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We have changed our name so many times over the past five years....for both girls and boys
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We keep going back to ellie. Name elena marie or elena rose. Also like genevieve hope or avery hope

 Dh now really likes zoey....I like Zoe

 We are still on middle names. Jane means god is gracious, marie means bitter, and grace means grace

 September 4, 2014: 23 weeks 2 days
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October 9, 2013: 28 weeks
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November 27, 2013

Maybe I am just over-worrying? Had an ob appt this am and a fms appt four hrs later. At the ob, when they measured my belly, she hesitated and then re-measured twice trying to get a better number because the measurement was small and I have consistently measured big. At the fms, I was scheduled for my every three week growth scan. Zoe has been measuring in the sixty fifth or higher range for gestational age. Last scan she was est five#one oz. this time, her first est was five#six oz. I panicked and said is that it...she was five# one oz three weeks ago!? Us tech remeasured and came up with a new est of five and eleven oz. One of the dr came in as normal and he said baby looks good. Upon questioning her decreased growth rate, he was not concerned bc she was in the forty second% for growth. I am concerned and stressed 

My size is one of my concerns for her growth. My entire family is giant...ranging from 6'6'' (brother) to 5'10" (mom who is the shortest in the fam). DH is average ht at about 5'10" and his family is kind of average. Because of the renal failure, my growth was severely stunted and I barely made it to 5 feet with the help of years of growth hormone injections. So I have wondered if genetically, she is big (which she has been measuring) and since my growth was so restricted from childhood health issues, is she running out of room. My other concern is has my antiphospholipid syndrome caused blood flow to be diminished. I am confident she is healthy, I just cant help but wonder if one of my multiple health issues is causing a problem.

November 30, 2013

 I'm spending the night in the hospital. The c.diff infection has caused me to lose a lot of fluid and my kidney function is declined because of my volume depletion. Also a bit acidotic. Baby is fine and I am hoping to have no more diarrhea and maybe eat in the morning without incident.

December 1, 2013
Im staying another night. I will be 36w tomorrow. My ob and fms will round in the morning. The on call ob for my ob says his gut feeling is the baby will be here this week but we will see what my docs say. 

 .....
Going home today! Baby is staying put for now and I wont be going back to work...nice to rest, but uses up my time with baby when she arrives :(
....
I already lost one week to the c diff infection in june and now losing two more, so im down to about nine weeks after baby comes. But dh is going to take vacation when I go back, so daddy/daughter bonding for 3 weeks. Then I am going to try to use some vacation time. Im really hoping to go parttime soon but thats not possible now

December 4, 2013
FMS is calling my OB to set a day for induction! He also told me that they won't let me labor too long so if I don't respond well/quickly to the pitocin, they will do section

 ........
I'm more afraid of vaginal delivery than C-section ;) They still say 38 weeks, which starts Dec 16th. So I have about 1.5 weeks left. Since my aggressive rehydration in the hospital, I have had serious lower extremity edema so I'm spending a lot of time with my feet up. Last night, DH said I looked like the CHF patients he runs on :( But my blood pressure is still excellent so it's not preeclampsia.



 January 5, 2014
I have to go back on my immunosuppressive medication that is a big no for breastfeeding. I am trying to pump to get some bm stored before I restart it but looking for recs on formula.
We've been having a really tough time with Zoe. She was constantly screaming and bucking away from the bottle. And had a rash in her forehead. So I decided to finally try a hypoallergenic formula. Already she is a different baby and it's only been two days. She got her immunizations today so is fussy but still but the screaming before. However, we now have to see peds surgery because her fontanelle is pretty much closed at two months

 December 30, 2014

It is a relief that in six months we will be done. No more bruises from Lovenox injections or crazy hormones. Adam and I will have been married seven years in April. In that time, I have been pregnant nine times (cumulative time of 113 weeks=2.17 years), lost 7 babies, delivered two babies-one my beautiful Zoe and the other a baby who never took a breath. We almost didn't continue to try because it was too hard but God used people and circumstances to push us forward. In June, we are expecting another baby girl and everything looks great. I pray I haven't passed on the Robertsonian translocation to our girls or that medical advances solve the issues. Through this journey we have grown so much. For anyone else struggling to have a family, there is hope. Doctors told us it wouldn't happen and urged us to stop trying. I also want to urge people not to be thoughtless with sharing your opinions and "comforting thoughts," or complaining about "stupid" stuff---others could be praying for what you're complaining about.
2015

 Feb 6, 2015

 Never thought I'd get to do it again. I remember telling Adam I was sad that I'd never be big and pregnant again (after we lost our 8th pregnancy and.I said enough.) And now I'm thankful to be able to feel Ellie moving around. I'm happy for me but can't help but know there are so many "mothers" without babies that are hurting. I think of you often even if I don't know who you are, I'm praying for you.

 February 18, 2015
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 I started a new job. Finances were getting tight. I'm working 2 days a week in a dispensing pharmacy from 730 to 630. And then about 32 hrs a month at the hospital.
unknown date

 During my 6th pregnany, the first trimester screening showed something very wrong with my baby. 
The doctor asked if I would like to schedule to terminate the pregnancy since the baby was not developing correctly. There was no hesitation from me. Heartbroken, I said no. 
He asked if I would like to schedule an amnio to see what we were dealing with. 
I agreed to scheduling the amnio, thinking maybe I could find support groups or plan where to deliver my baby for the best chances of survival.
I was beyond heartbroken. This baby I had prayed for and hoped for... this child I carried was sick. I knew that God held my life and my baby's life in His hands. That my child could be healed. We prayed. We hoped. We cried...a lot.
Going through each day was difficult. And then the day came that our baby's heart stopped beating.
I am thankful that I have since been blessed with 2 living, beautiful girls. But I know I have 6 babies in heaven with God. I loved them their entire lives on earth and still weep about the lost memories I had from the moment I learned they were growing below my heart.

May 2nd, 2014

Getting darker
Comments

From BT friends:   Good luck, I feel like this is a sticky one!

Candice:  I feel like this one is a sticky one too. And I feel like it's a boy

........after appointment:

  •  Candice: Well, not sticky enough. No heartbeat and measuring a week behind.



  • June 12, 2014
  • D and C.is over. Doing good. Just waiting for.the pitocin to finish. Zoe has stomach virus and I started getting sick at about 1am. DH just texted that he's sick now too. My nurse is a bit insensitive because when she found out I had an almost 6 month old she said oh well it was probably too soon anyway. Idiot.
From comments: me telling or answering from bt support group
I usually miscarry before 9 weeks so I waited until 9w2d for first ultrasound. They're was no heartbeat and baby measured 8w2d. Dr wanted D&C because of all my other health issues so my stats are now 8 pregnancies, 1 living baby, 6 missed mc/D&Cs, and 1 "natural" at home mc.

Husband is in bed asleep. He feels awful that he is leaving me to take care of Zoe but I assured him I was fine (bit of a lie) and to go to sleep. Zoe is refusing her bottle so we're spoon feeding her non flavored pedialyte and she's sucking on a pedialyte soaked rag. Guess she figured out that everything she had a bottle, she got sick within ten minutes. We tried to give the pedialyte in the bottle but she refuses the bottle completely. Still having wet diapers but it's getting hard to get liquids in her. The diarrhea is slowing down a bit. 

Zoe is taking the bottle again. And smiling as she diarrheas while in wiping her. She thinks it's hilarious. I do hate this bt. We were so sure about ttc for one more but I don't know if I want to keep doing this. Thinking about taking coq10 and trying one more time but really I don't know.


It's bittersweet but our ttc journey is over. If it was only the bt, then it'd be different but with the renal transplant, antiphospolipid syndrome, and recurrent c.diff, my health is in the balance and there is concern about me losing my kidney if we continue ttc. Still amazed that we are blessed with a sweet baby girl. One day, we may be blessed with other children through adoption or as foster parents

I told DH I wanted to give the ubiquinol 3 months to work unless he felt it was time to try sooner. Well, I.started having ovulation cramping, the electricity went out, our phones were basically dead, my kindle had 5%...so now I have a faint line. I'll recheck in a couple days and see if it gets darker. DH is praying for a son that we will call Eli. This will hopefully be the last pregnancy (1 way or another...I need to get off this rollercoaster), so I'm thinking about doing a cutesy announcement to DH after testing again. And maybe announce to family at Zoe's first bday. We're doing blues clues so we could have clues for what's Zoe's news?
It's getting darker: 1 day apart
No photo description available.
October 19, 2014
My period was due today. The line is much darker now. Come on baby Eli. You can make it. Adam's positive it's a boy.
No photo description available.
My plan is to take my lovenox, aspirin, increase my prednisone, and stop my azathioprine and call for an ultrasound after 9 weeks. And try not to obsess. AND PRAY PRAY PRAY
BT friend: "So dark! This is a good one. I can feel it."
Candice: "I hope so because I was very on the fence about ttc again. DH and I feel good about this one too."


Ultrasound in 9 hours. I should be 9w4d. We've only seen heartbeat heartbeat after 9 weeks 2 of our 8 pregnancies (1 became my dd). Hoping nine is a lucky number.
Later....
No photo description available.
Measuring 9 weeks, 5 days. Heartbeat of 169!!


December 8, 2014: And to think, Adam was going to have a vasectomy
11w2d. Oddly, all three times, baby's heart rate has been 169.

----Possibly an amnio if something shows up on the nuchal translucency scan...waiting for a call to schedule.
-----Yes, Adam was to have his vasectomy early September and then I broke my foot so he cancelled. He prayed for a boy and has already named him. Excited to find out the gender.

---Yes. I'm considering the harmony test but would probably just do the amnio to know everything. With trisomy 13 there's so many markers seen on ultrasound. We scheduled ammio after an abnormal nuchal with my sixth pregnancy but miscarried before it was done.


Our two year old sleeps great. Has since 8 months old. 8 months, only woke once eat. Our new lo is almost 9 months and cries all night. Goes down okay, sleeps for an hour, wakes up, I help her resettle, she's up again every hr. Crying most of the night. We tried taking her to bed with us but she screamed even more. Any ideas?
She goes to sleep on her own but just wakes frequently and then just screams hysterically
She's never slept great. Use to nurse all night....wouldn't take a bottle during day while I was at work. So we made her have bottles at night and I nursed only during day to try to fix that. Then she started doing okay. Like just waking once and like 2 times slept 8 hrs. Then she got sick start of 7 months old. Cough, congestion...and never slept good since then.
Day sleeps are 45 min to 3 hrs. She's so inconsistent. She is recently switched to formula for the last month. Doing great on it. Baby's only organic whey
To fall asleep, we put her in crib drowsy but awake, she rolls onto her side with pacifier in mouth and holding lovey
Last night she Cried for like 3 hrs even while I held her. But when she wakes up for the day she's super happy. Poor baby is constantly hoarse from all the crying
Got her on reflux meds, decreased her bottle volume, elevated her crib. ..last night she went six hrs!!!!
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